Chapter Six - The Discovery
'Do you know my father?’
The two soldiers just looked at Katka. It was the same two she had seen on her first day in this town and they were sitting in the same cafe in the square, sitting in exactly the same positions, one with his leg outstretched and resting on a chair, the other sipping from a coffee cup.
‘My father. He’s a soldier in the German army, just like you, do you know him?’
The soldier with his leg on the chair began to laugh, slow at first, just a smile that appeared on his face, then a laugh. He laughed out loud.
Long and hard, and the other soldier joined with him.
‘Young girl, do you know how many soldiers there are in the German army?’
Katka began to feel stupid.
‘Thirteen million.’ he said, ‘Do you think I know all of them personally. You haven’t even told me what his name is!’
Katka wished she had waited. She felt stupid and small, like a little girl standing in the square in the cold and speaking in through the window of a cafe to two German soldiers who had no interest in helping her. They were prepared to speak to her though and the soldier with his booted foot on the chair sat up a little, put his foot on the floor, ‘What is his name?’
‘Jan.’ Katka said, although immediately she was unsure.
‘Jan?’ The soldier laughed. His friend laughed too and the first soldier turned to him and he said in a tone filled with sarcasm, ‘Rudi, do you know a soldier in the German army called Jan?’
The second soldier laughed out loud, buckling forward with the exertion, ‘I think he’s friends with Hans.’
‘Young girl, there are thirteen million soldiers in the German army, if all you can tell us is he is called Jan how can we possibly help you? Do you not even know his last name?’’
Katka wanted to lie and tell the soldier it was the same as hers but the truth was she didn’t know and she felt so pathetic suddenly, so small, and how humiliating that she needed to ask these things to Anna, her only connection to her old life, to the life she never had.
The soldier shook his head. He had stopped laughing now, he looked at Katka and it was a glint of kindness in his eyes that he said, ‘I am sorry, but you are out of luck. Do you even know if he was German or Czech.’
‘Czech.’ Katka said.
‘And he wanted to join the German army.’ the soldier whistled under his breath, ‘He was a brave man, he probably won’t be coming back here though, if he is even still alive, that is.’
Just then Katka heard Anna calling to her. , ‘Katka.’ she called. She was on the other side of the square and when Katka turned she saw she was waving with her arm for her to come over, to hurry up. It was morning and time for their shift at the factory and she was probably angry, or maybe just worried at the way Kata had run from the flat this morning, with the sudden stupid idea to speak to the soldiers.
Katka signalled to Anna that she was coming.
‘I am sorry we couldn’t help.’ the soldier called after Katka as she walked away, in no rush to catch up with Anna, to be told off by her. Talking to the soldiers had been a stupid thing to do. But the soldier gave Katka such a sympathetic smile as she walked away.
It was confusing and impossible to get clear in her head.
‘But I did tell you not to speak to them.’ Anna said when Katka had caught up with her and she noticed how quiet Katka was, how sad she looked.
‘I just though -’ but she was unable to finish what she wanted to say.
‘You thought you could find him, that he might remember you.’
Katka looked away, across the street. They were on the road that led to the factory and for the first time Katka noticed that the houses on this road were marked, thick lettered words in white paint smeared across the doors - the word jude, other words too.
‘Katka, please.’ Anna said and she took hold of Katka’s arm, ‘Don’t think, don’t worry about these things. There is talk of the war ending soon, that the Soviets are coming from the north, the British from the west, this war will be over soon and when it is -’
‘He won’t want to see me.’ Katka said, interrupting Anna and at the same time hating her for trying to brush the matter aside so thoughtlessly, to tell Katka it didn’t matter. But it did matter, she thought, it matters a great deal that she had lost her mother and she had no idea who her father was.
‘Katka, please.’ Anna begged.
‘What was his name?’ Katka said.
‘’Katka, what does that matter now?’
‘What was his name?’ Katka demanded.
‘Jan.’ Anna said, then after a pause, a few paces along the road, ‘Rozec, his name was Jan Rozec.’
It took Katka a moment for the information to register, then she looked at Anna, ‘Your name? He had the same name as you. Was he your -’
‘Brother?’ Anna stopped in the road, ‘Yes, he was my brother and now he is fighting with the German army.’
‘And he is Czech?’
‘Czech, German, Katka, what difference does it make. Don’t you see? These things don’t matter now, not in this life we live in.’ She took hold of Katka by the shoulders, stooped so she was speaking directly into her face, ‘He did not even care what the Germans were doing, he was not a Nazi -’
‘No, that’s not what I mean, I just didn’t think -’ she stopped, ‘It doesn’t matter, ‘I don’t care what he did, I don’t care about any of this, ‘I just want to know who he was, that’s all.’
At the gates of the factory Anna pulled Katka to her, ‘We will speak tonight, back in the flat. Don’t be foolish today, don’t ask any questions. Remember, you are the girl from Ostrava.’
And when Katka was inside, at her desk and with an empty seat next to her where the old woman had used to sit and with bullet casings in front of her and the acrid smell of gunpowder filling the air, thick and sooty, the day passed quickly, far quicker than it ought to have.
Katka was afraid.
She thought about her father, Anna’s brother, she thought of the questions she should ask. She wanted to hear all about him, about her marriage to her mother. Had they even been married? Katka thought. Had they loved each other, would he want to see me if I find him? Because I want to find him, I want to speak to him about my mother, Katka thought. And it wasn’t until the end of the shift, when the alarm sounded and the women on the factory floor, with the first enthusiasm of the day, stood up from their workstations and began for the door, that Katka was able to speak about his again.
Immediately she was with Anna again she said, ‘I want to know everything about him.’ and in the same breath, ‘I want to go and find him.’
Anna would have laughed if she hadn’t at the same time looked so suddenly afraid, ‘Find him?’ They walked a few paces before Anna spoke again, ‘You do realise there is a war happening, don’t you?’
‘I need to find him.’ Katka said again, knowing at the same time that it was useless, that to find him amongst thirteen million soldiers spread out across Europe was completely impossible. But throughout the day the thought had been in her head, trapped like a fly inside two window panes.
I have to find him, Katka thought.
Once they were back in Anna’s flat, Katka immediately wanted to ask questions, but Anna stopped her. ‘It does not make him evil, you know.’ she said, speaking with enough force to quieten Katka. She closed the front door and went on, ‘I know what you're thinking and I know what people say. Trust me, I have heard them and I have had to listen to them too. That old woman in the factory who was taken away yesterday, there are plenty like her, telling me how he should be killed, how all Germans should be killed. They hate me in this town, hate me for what my brother did.’
‘But it was not you-’ Katka began.
‘It does not matter. It is what people think that matters. And when this war is over I am sure they will make it clear to me how they feel.’
‘What will happen?’ Katka asked.
Anna did not answer.
‘We learnt at school,’ Katka began, thinking, grasping for anything she could say to Anna that might help, ‘about the old empire. Wasn’t it the same then, isn’t this just the same thing happening again?’
Anna shook her head. ‘I do not know.’ she said and she repeated, ‘I do not know.’
They ate a meal of soup and shared some bread together. Neither spoke whilst they ate, partly though not wanting to speak, but also because they were hungry and the food, meagre though it was, felt good in their stomachs. Katka felt warm and calm, it was the first proper food she had eaten in days. Once it was finished she asked Anna if she had a picture of her father.
‘He was a handsome man.’ Anna said, taking down a shoe box that she had inside a cupboard in the living room. ‘It is no surprise your mother was so in love with him.’
‘But he did not love her.’ Katka asked, taking the first picture Anna handed to her.
‘They were very young.’ Anna replied, and it was clear she did not want to answer Katka’s question. ‘Your mother was too young and my brother, my younger brother, was only twenty-one when he left for Germany.’
‘How old was I?’ Asked Katka.
‘You were nine when your mother took you to Prague. But she had been alone for some time before that. About five when he left, I suppose.’
‘And that flat I lived in, with mother, and with you living in the flat upstairs, did they live together there?’
‘For a short time.’ Anna replied, ‘It was our grandmother’s flat. It was one of the reasons -’ she stopped for a moment, ‘Jan thought that if he fought for them we would be able to stay there once the Germans came, he said it was one of the reasons he wanted to join -’
‘I don’t understand.’ Katka said.
Anna shook her head, ‘It does not matter.’ She said, ‘It is just this land, it is disputed here, this land has been fought over before. Here -’ She said, handing Katka another picture. It was a picture of two people and immediately Katka recognised the woman.
‘Is this how they were? I mean, when they were married. They look so happy together.’
‘They were never married.’ Anna said.
The picture was of Katka’s parents together on a bench. It was easy to recognise where it had been taken, in the square on the bench in front of the station building. Katka’s father had his arm loosely draped across her mother’s shoulder. He was smiling, she was leaning into him.
And it was easy to see what Anna had meant when she had said he was handsome. His smile was broad and real, he had kind eyes and with thick blond hair.
Katka thought about this picture as she lay awake in her bed that night. She thought about what the soldiers had said to her too. Her father was probably dead. He was a foreigner fighting in the German army and the fighting had been fierce apparently, Anna had said the same as they had talked late into the evening. ‘Neither of us will see him again.’ She had told Katka, solemn but kind.
But somehow Katka knew this was not true. She would see him again, somehow she was sure and it was no surprise either when, late in the night, when Anna was fast asleep and Katka, sleepless and with a head that would not be quieted, got out of her bed and looked out of the window that faced into the square and saw someone else that she recognised.
He was wrapped in a heavy grey coat. It surely wasn’t his, too big for his thin frame, He had his hands thrust into his pockets and was sitting on the same bench Katka’s mother and father had sat on in the photograph.
It was Paul.
Katka opened the window at once. It was hard to believe that he could still be alive. He looked up when he heard the creak of the window opening, and then he smiled.
'Did you really think I was dead?’ he laughed, speaking as soon as Katka was outside. She flung her arms around him.
‘How did you find me?’ She asked.
Again he laughed, ‘You’re easy to find.’
‘In the home, you must have asked there? But are they still looking for me? Oh, I can’t believe you’re not dead.’ Katka said, her words coming in a rush, she hugged him again. ‘Tell me how you got away. What happened that night? I heard a gun being fired.’
But Paul only shrugged at these questions. He leant back against the backrest of the bench and breathed out, ‘It was nothing.’ he said, ‘Nothing I haven’t been through before.’ and when Katka looked at him, leant back on the seat next to him and stared at him in disbelief, he went on, ‘So you don’t think I’ve been arrested before? Of course I have. And besides, the war’s nearly over. The Germans have got bigger things to worry about now. Give it two months and they’ll all be gone.’
‘And what then?’
‘What do you meant, what then? The war will be over, that’s what.’
‘Exactly, what then? I can’t go back to Prague.’
‘No.’ Paul shook his head, ‘The police are still looking for you. I heard.’
‘So what do I do?’
‘Stay here. Keep your head down, wait.’
‘No.’ Katka said, and she told Paul about the factory, ‘I can’t do that work, I can’t supply them with bullet for their guns.’ she said and she told him about her mother too, about her death, and then about her father, ‘I can’t stay here, Paul. I have to move on. It isn’t my home anymore. It isn't safe.’
For a moment Paul was quiet, he looked ahead into the darkness of the square, the cafe on the far side, the empty flower baskets hanging from the lamp-posts. He shook his head, ‘It isn’t safe anywhere, in a few months maybe, but not now. They say the fighting in the north is intense.’
‘But, Paul, I can’t stay here.’
‘So stay in Prague, stay in the streets, Stay in that apartment I just saw you coming out of, I don’t know!’ he sounded exasperated.
‘Will you help me, Paul?’ Katka asked.
‘Help you do what?’
‘My father is in Germany. I want to find him.’
‘What?’ he sounded suddenly annoyed.
‘I know, I know,’ Katka replied, stumbling for the right words to explain, and she felt as hopeless as she had when speaking to the soldiers earlier, ‘there are thirteen million soldiers but-’
‘Most of them are dead.’ Paul said.
'-But one of them is my father.'
'Most of them are dead.' Paul said again.
‘Yes, but I know, I he's alive, I know he is.’
Paul shook his head, he looked away. And this made Katka angry. She had made up her mind, all through the day the thought had returned to her, had kept returning, ‘I have to find him.’
‘But Katka, it’s not safe.’
‘I know, Paul. You said. Nowhere is safe now.' she paused, 'But will you help me?’ Before he could answer, she went on, ‘I have money. A lot of money, I took it from the home, from the safe because I thought it was mine.’
‘Katka, the money won’t help. You have no way of finding him.’
‘No, I do,’ Katka replied, ‘There is an old woman, I spoke to her yesterday. She said she knew my father, she told me she knew where he had gone.’
‘Katka, I don't know -’ Paul said, but the uncertainty in his voice only spurred Katka on. She turned so she was facing him. ‘I will find him, Paul. I am going to Germany. I have to, and if I die trying I don’t care. Can’t you see? There is nothing here for me, nothing in this town and nothing in Prague. I have lost my mother. I will not lose my father too.’
Paul thought for a moment. ‘Alright.’ he said. He stood up from the bench. Katka stood up too. ‘Go to your flat. Get your money. Let’s leave tonight.’
The two soldiers just looked at Katka. It was the same two she had seen on her first day in this town and they were sitting in the same cafe in the square, sitting in exactly the same positions, one with his leg outstretched and resting on a chair, the other sipping from a coffee cup.
‘My father. He’s a soldier in the German army, just like you, do you know him?’
The soldier with his leg on the chair began to laugh, slow at first, just a smile that appeared on his face, then a laugh. He laughed out loud.
Long and hard, and the other soldier joined with him.
‘Young girl, do you know how many soldiers there are in the German army?’
Katka began to feel stupid.
‘Thirteen million.’ he said, ‘Do you think I know all of them personally. You haven’t even told me what his name is!’
Katka wished she had waited. She felt stupid and small, like a little girl standing in the square in the cold and speaking in through the window of a cafe to two German soldiers who had no interest in helping her. They were prepared to speak to her though and the soldier with his booted foot on the chair sat up a little, put his foot on the floor, ‘What is his name?’
‘Jan.’ Katka said, although immediately she was unsure.
‘Jan?’ The soldier laughed. His friend laughed too and the first soldier turned to him and he said in a tone filled with sarcasm, ‘Rudi, do you know a soldier in the German army called Jan?’
The second soldier laughed out loud, buckling forward with the exertion, ‘I think he’s friends with Hans.’
‘Young girl, there are thirteen million soldiers in the German army, if all you can tell us is he is called Jan how can we possibly help you? Do you not even know his last name?’’
Katka wanted to lie and tell the soldier it was the same as hers but the truth was she didn’t know and she felt so pathetic suddenly, so small, and how humiliating that she needed to ask these things to Anna, her only connection to her old life, to the life she never had.
The soldier shook his head. He had stopped laughing now, he looked at Katka and it was a glint of kindness in his eyes that he said, ‘I am sorry, but you are out of luck. Do you even know if he was German or Czech.’
‘Czech.’ Katka said.
‘And he wanted to join the German army.’ the soldier whistled under his breath, ‘He was a brave man, he probably won’t be coming back here though, if he is even still alive, that is.’
Just then Katka heard Anna calling to her. , ‘Katka.’ she called. She was on the other side of the square and when Katka turned she saw she was waving with her arm for her to come over, to hurry up. It was morning and time for their shift at the factory and she was probably angry, or maybe just worried at the way Kata had run from the flat this morning, with the sudden stupid idea to speak to the soldiers.
Katka signalled to Anna that she was coming.
‘I am sorry we couldn’t help.’ the soldier called after Katka as she walked away, in no rush to catch up with Anna, to be told off by her. Talking to the soldiers had been a stupid thing to do. But the soldier gave Katka such a sympathetic smile as she walked away.
It was confusing and impossible to get clear in her head.
‘But I did tell you not to speak to them.’ Anna said when Katka had caught up with her and she noticed how quiet Katka was, how sad she looked.
‘I just though -’ but she was unable to finish what she wanted to say.
‘You thought you could find him, that he might remember you.’
Katka looked away, across the street. They were on the road that led to the factory and for the first time Katka noticed that the houses on this road were marked, thick lettered words in white paint smeared across the doors - the word jude, other words too.
‘Katka, please.’ Anna said and she took hold of Katka’s arm, ‘Don’t think, don’t worry about these things. There is talk of the war ending soon, that the Soviets are coming from the north, the British from the west, this war will be over soon and when it is -’
‘He won’t want to see me.’ Katka said, interrupting Anna and at the same time hating her for trying to brush the matter aside so thoughtlessly, to tell Katka it didn’t matter. But it did matter, she thought, it matters a great deal that she had lost her mother and she had no idea who her father was.
‘Katka, please.’ Anna begged.
‘What was his name?’ Katka said.
‘’Katka, what does that matter now?’
‘What was his name?’ Katka demanded.
‘Jan.’ Anna said, then after a pause, a few paces along the road, ‘Rozec, his name was Jan Rozec.’
It took Katka a moment for the information to register, then she looked at Anna, ‘Your name? He had the same name as you. Was he your -’
‘Brother?’ Anna stopped in the road, ‘Yes, he was my brother and now he is fighting with the German army.’
‘And he is Czech?’
‘Czech, German, Katka, what difference does it make. Don’t you see? These things don’t matter now, not in this life we live in.’ She took hold of Katka by the shoulders, stooped so she was speaking directly into her face, ‘He did not even care what the Germans were doing, he was not a Nazi -’
‘No, that’s not what I mean, I just didn’t think -’ she stopped, ‘It doesn’t matter, ‘I don’t care what he did, I don’t care about any of this, ‘I just want to know who he was, that’s all.’
At the gates of the factory Anna pulled Katka to her, ‘We will speak tonight, back in the flat. Don’t be foolish today, don’t ask any questions. Remember, you are the girl from Ostrava.’
And when Katka was inside, at her desk and with an empty seat next to her where the old woman had used to sit and with bullet casings in front of her and the acrid smell of gunpowder filling the air, thick and sooty, the day passed quickly, far quicker than it ought to have.
Katka was afraid.
She thought about her father, Anna’s brother, she thought of the questions she should ask. She wanted to hear all about him, about her marriage to her mother. Had they even been married? Katka thought. Had they loved each other, would he want to see me if I find him? Because I want to find him, I want to speak to him about my mother, Katka thought. And it wasn’t until the end of the shift, when the alarm sounded and the women on the factory floor, with the first enthusiasm of the day, stood up from their workstations and began for the door, that Katka was able to speak about his again.
Immediately she was with Anna again she said, ‘I want to know everything about him.’ and in the same breath, ‘I want to go and find him.’
Anna would have laughed if she hadn’t at the same time looked so suddenly afraid, ‘Find him?’ They walked a few paces before Anna spoke again, ‘You do realise there is a war happening, don’t you?’
‘I need to find him.’ Katka said again, knowing at the same time that it was useless, that to find him amongst thirteen million soldiers spread out across Europe was completely impossible. But throughout the day the thought had been in her head, trapped like a fly inside two window panes.
I have to find him, Katka thought.
Once they were back in Anna’s flat, Katka immediately wanted to ask questions, but Anna stopped her. ‘It does not make him evil, you know.’ she said, speaking with enough force to quieten Katka. She closed the front door and went on, ‘I know what you're thinking and I know what people say. Trust me, I have heard them and I have had to listen to them too. That old woman in the factory who was taken away yesterday, there are plenty like her, telling me how he should be killed, how all Germans should be killed. They hate me in this town, hate me for what my brother did.’
‘But it was not you-’ Katka began.
‘It does not matter. It is what people think that matters. And when this war is over I am sure they will make it clear to me how they feel.’
‘What will happen?’ Katka asked.
Anna did not answer.
‘We learnt at school,’ Katka began, thinking, grasping for anything she could say to Anna that might help, ‘about the old empire. Wasn’t it the same then, isn’t this just the same thing happening again?’
Anna shook her head. ‘I do not know.’ she said and she repeated, ‘I do not know.’
They ate a meal of soup and shared some bread together. Neither spoke whilst they ate, partly though not wanting to speak, but also because they were hungry and the food, meagre though it was, felt good in their stomachs. Katka felt warm and calm, it was the first proper food she had eaten in days. Once it was finished she asked Anna if she had a picture of her father.
‘He was a handsome man.’ Anna said, taking down a shoe box that she had inside a cupboard in the living room. ‘It is no surprise your mother was so in love with him.’
‘But he did not love her.’ Katka asked, taking the first picture Anna handed to her.
‘They were very young.’ Anna replied, and it was clear she did not want to answer Katka’s question. ‘Your mother was too young and my brother, my younger brother, was only twenty-one when he left for Germany.’
‘How old was I?’ Asked Katka.
‘You were nine when your mother took you to Prague. But she had been alone for some time before that. About five when he left, I suppose.’
‘And that flat I lived in, with mother, and with you living in the flat upstairs, did they live together there?’
‘For a short time.’ Anna replied, ‘It was our grandmother’s flat. It was one of the reasons -’ she stopped for a moment, ‘Jan thought that if he fought for them we would be able to stay there once the Germans came, he said it was one of the reasons he wanted to join -’
‘I don’t understand.’ Katka said.
Anna shook her head, ‘It does not matter.’ She said, ‘It is just this land, it is disputed here, this land has been fought over before. Here -’ She said, handing Katka another picture. It was a picture of two people and immediately Katka recognised the woman.
‘Is this how they were? I mean, when they were married. They look so happy together.’
‘They were never married.’ Anna said.
The picture was of Katka’s parents together on a bench. It was easy to recognise where it had been taken, in the square on the bench in front of the station building. Katka’s father had his arm loosely draped across her mother’s shoulder. He was smiling, she was leaning into him.
And it was easy to see what Anna had meant when she had said he was handsome. His smile was broad and real, he had kind eyes and with thick blond hair.
Katka thought about this picture as she lay awake in her bed that night. She thought about what the soldiers had said to her too. Her father was probably dead. He was a foreigner fighting in the German army and the fighting had been fierce apparently, Anna had said the same as they had talked late into the evening. ‘Neither of us will see him again.’ She had told Katka, solemn but kind.
But somehow Katka knew this was not true. She would see him again, somehow she was sure and it was no surprise either when, late in the night, when Anna was fast asleep and Katka, sleepless and with a head that would not be quieted, got out of her bed and looked out of the window that faced into the square and saw someone else that she recognised.
He was wrapped in a heavy grey coat. It surely wasn’t his, too big for his thin frame, He had his hands thrust into his pockets and was sitting on the same bench Katka’s mother and father had sat on in the photograph.
It was Paul.
Katka opened the window at once. It was hard to believe that he could still be alive. He looked up when he heard the creak of the window opening, and then he smiled.
'Did you really think I was dead?’ he laughed, speaking as soon as Katka was outside. She flung her arms around him.
‘How did you find me?’ She asked.
Again he laughed, ‘You’re easy to find.’
‘In the home, you must have asked there? But are they still looking for me? Oh, I can’t believe you’re not dead.’ Katka said, her words coming in a rush, she hugged him again. ‘Tell me how you got away. What happened that night? I heard a gun being fired.’
But Paul only shrugged at these questions. He leant back against the backrest of the bench and breathed out, ‘It was nothing.’ he said, ‘Nothing I haven’t been through before.’ and when Katka looked at him, leant back on the seat next to him and stared at him in disbelief, he went on, ‘So you don’t think I’ve been arrested before? Of course I have. And besides, the war’s nearly over. The Germans have got bigger things to worry about now. Give it two months and they’ll all be gone.’
‘And what then?’
‘What do you meant, what then? The war will be over, that’s what.’
‘Exactly, what then? I can’t go back to Prague.’
‘No.’ Paul shook his head, ‘The police are still looking for you. I heard.’
‘So what do I do?’
‘Stay here. Keep your head down, wait.’
‘No.’ Katka said, and she told Paul about the factory, ‘I can’t do that work, I can’t supply them with bullet for their guns.’ she said and she told him about her mother too, about her death, and then about her father, ‘I can’t stay here, Paul. I have to move on. It isn’t my home anymore. It isn't safe.’
For a moment Paul was quiet, he looked ahead into the darkness of the square, the cafe on the far side, the empty flower baskets hanging from the lamp-posts. He shook his head, ‘It isn’t safe anywhere, in a few months maybe, but not now. They say the fighting in the north is intense.’
‘But, Paul, I can’t stay here.’
‘So stay in Prague, stay in the streets, Stay in that apartment I just saw you coming out of, I don’t know!’ he sounded exasperated.
‘Will you help me, Paul?’ Katka asked.
‘Help you do what?’
‘My father is in Germany. I want to find him.’
‘What?’ he sounded suddenly annoyed.
‘I know, I know,’ Katka replied, stumbling for the right words to explain, and she felt as hopeless as she had when speaking to the soldiers earlier, ‘there are thirteen million soldiers but-’
‘Most of them are dead.’ Paul said.
'-But one of them is my father.'
'Most of them are dead.' Paul said again.
‘Yes, but I know, I he's alive, I know he is.’
Paul shook his head, he looked away. And this made Katka angry. She had made up her mind, all through the day the thought had returned to her, had kept returning, ‘I have to find him.’
‘But Katka, it’s not safe.’
‘I know, Paul. You said. Nowhere is safe now.' she paused, 'But will you help me?’ Before he could answer, she went on, ‘I have money. A lot of money, I took it from the home, from the safe because I thought it was mine.’
‘Katka, the money won’t help. You have no way of finding him.’
‘No, I do,’ Katka replied, ‘There is an old woman, I spoke to her yesterday. She said she knew my father, she told me she knew where he had gone.’
‘Katka, I don't know -’ Paul said, but the uncertainty in his voice only spurred Katka on. She turned so she was facing him. ‘I will find him, Paul. I am going to Germany. I have to, and if I die trying I don’t care. Can’t you see? There is nothing here for me, nothing in this town and nothing in Prague. I have lost my mother. I will not lose my father too.’
Paul thought for a moment. ‘Alright.’ he said. He stood up from the bench. Katka stood up too. ‘Go to your flat. Get your money. Let’s leave tonight.’